How to Impress Basically Everyone
So winning people over with your awesome culinary skills, but don’t know what to make? Well, do you even know how to cook? If you’re lost like me and spend hours and hours googling recipes, fear not my friends. You have to meet my food gurus. Food Wishes and Chrissy Teigen’s So Delushious.
Food Wishes is genius. Have a food wish? Want to know how to make proper green beans or creme brulee? Email Chef John and with a stroke of luck, it could be his next blog post. I love the cheesy videos and the detailed instructions along with the friendly voice of Chef John. He makes it look so easy. And it is! If I can do it, you can. I enjoy cooking, but I wouldn’t say I’m anybody’s first pick for a dinner party. I ruin the recipe by not following the recipe. In other words, extreme attention deficit disorder to the details. Don’t be like me and be overconfident on ‘eyeball measuring’ unless you’re a trained professional. So if you’re obligated to cook, don’t ruin it for yourself and everyone else, follow the recipe!
Chrissy Teigen is on my list of Hot Girls I’d date. Yes this list is real. So the super model can’t get fat, eats bacon regularly, and has thighs that don’t touch. She’s pretty much a skinny bitch I’d trust. I trust her with all my first world bacon problems. No introduction needed.
Here are the three recipes that made people believe I was the next top chef. AND I didn’t even break a sweat. Lies, only when I was hovering over that Le Creuset.
Recipe One: Super Evil Bacon Meatballs
These spawns of the devil are evil because they will be the cause of that extra inch on your thighs. BUT THEY ARE SO GOOD. I found it on So Delushious and pretty much was convinced when the recipe called for chopped bacon. I followed the recipe exactly! I could have taken them off the stove earlier, but I was too obsessed with my new Le Creuset. Next time, no more distractions!
Serve them on a roll! Make that baby a sub, melt some cheese, wet it with marinara, done. I served them simple, topping it with marinara sauce, and they were gone in a matter of minutes.
Recipe Two: Christmas Lasagna for anytime of the year
I love lasagna. I usually layer mine with vegetables instead of pasta and add even more chopped vegetables in my sauce. This time, I wanted a more traditional lasagna. Cheese, meat sauce, heaven. Why is it so hard to find a lasagna recipe I could follow. Chefs love to add every herb in the dictionary, but I wanted simple people!
Chef John would be disappointed because I didn’t buy the huge lasagna dish. This will have to do. I don’t have pictures of the finished product, but you can trust it was that good that I forgot to take a picture. Twelve slices gone!
Recipe Three: Spinach and Artichoke Dip
This recipe was so easy to follow! Key ingredients: melted butter with scallions and garlic to add that extra flavor! It filled two ramekins and served them with baguette slices. Because I am a glutton, I saved the second ramekin for a midnight snack with pita chips.
So lessons learned? Take a god damn picture before stuffing my face and only lightly brown the meatballs! I’m excited to try a few more recipes from both blogs. Check out Food Wishes and So Delushious! Win over strangers and convince friends that you are the hostess with the mostess! Bacon will surely impress even the darkest souls.